I've written three posts here on Substack about my experience growing up adopted. My birth mother had eight children. I was the only one given up for adoption. My early years were rough. My adoptive father struggled with mental illness. He was abusive and a bully. But, even children who are adopted in the best homes and have a truly loving and supportive adoptive family still suffer from the original wound of being taken from their birth mother. If our society really wanted to help mothers who don't have the support they need to care for and raise a child, we'd make the means available. We wouldn't take the baby away, traumatizing both mother and child. If birth parents are dead or gone, adoption seems a good solution. Otherwise, it is not.
I've written about the Good side of the coin, and how fortunate that was. I had never really even considered the Dark side of it until after my parents were gone, which was well into my 40s. After time, revelations and due consideration, I can well understand how many can be so negatively affected by such a process.
It took a Very long time and a certian amount of learning about where I actually came from to realize that I am a 'throw-away' like some others are. It leads to an amount of animosity against the person(s) who derilected their duty in the face of parenthood- Just Because.
The basic premise of right vs wrong applies.
For those who did right, there will be a special place.
I've written three posts here on Substack about my experience growing up adopted. My birth mother had eight children. I was the only one given up for adoption. My early years were rough. My adoptive father struggled with mental illness. He was abusive and a bully. But, even children who are adopted in the best homes and have a truly loving and supportive adoptive family still suffer from the original wound of being taken from their birth mother. If our society really wanted to help mothers who don't have the support they need to care for and raise a child, we'd make the means available. We wouldn't take the baby away, traumatizing both mother and child. If birth parents are dead or gone, adoption seems a good solution. Otherwise, it is not.
I've written about the Good side of the coin, and how fortunate that was. I had never really even considered the Dark side of it until after my parents were gone, which was well into my 40s. After time, revelations and due consideration, I can well understand how many can be so negatively affected by such a process.
It took a Very long time and a certian amount of learning about where I actually came from to realize that I am a 'throw-away' like some others are. It leads to an amount of animosity against the person(s) who derilected their duty in the face of parenthood- Just Because.
The basic premise of right vs wrong applies.
For those who did right, there will be a special place.
For those who did wrong- judgment awaits.